Powerless

I really wish I had come across this video two or three months ago.  It would have made me feel much better about my situation.  Living in Spain has been a challenge since day 1. Don't get me wrong, I have no regrets about coming here.  It's a beautiful country and I see something new everyday, however it can be a bit overwhelming trying to keep up with the native Spanish speakers.  Back home in the U.S., while I was surrounded by plenty of Spanish speakers, I could always fall back on English if I ran into trouble.  Here, that just isn't the case.  I have to challenge myself each and every day to express myself as clearly as possible in Spanish.  While I practiced speaking the language for many years before moving here to Madrid, nothing could have prepared me entirely for what I would face.  Sure, I had learned how to ask for a table at a restaurant, but as far as being able to identify all of the items listed on the menu?  Not a chance.  The best I could do was seek out "pollo," and hope for the best.

Like Gordon, in the video above, I had always been the protagonist of my life.  I paid the bills, I drove, I knew where places were, and I knew how to find my way around.  Here in Spain, after living here for four months, I am just now gaining the confidence to drive around on my own.  I know how to get to a few places, but I fear if I take a wrong turn, all my accumulated Spanish knowledge will be useless if I can't ask for directions home.  And when the phone rings at home?  Forget it.  I know I can do it, but the thought of trying to maintain a phone conversation just give me a headache.  I know I shouldn't be avoiding these situations, I should be diving in head first at this point, but it can be very difficult to be confident when you feel so powerless.  It's amazing just how important language is in our lives each and every day.

I wonder how many out there face these struggles when it comes to learning a second language?  It's one thing to learn it as a hobby, but something entirely different to learn it as a matter of survival.  Thoughts?