The Trip To Spain

The idea came to me mostly as a lark last November.  I had often said in passing that I would like to see another country but I had never made any real attempts at actually going through with it.  The "old" me was very good at talking the talk but never walking the walk.  I would say all kinds of things to my friends only to back out at the last minute.  One day I let it slip out that I would like to see Spain someday, not with the intention of going on vacation, but rather to spend time there totally immersed in the language.  I had become frustrated with my progress in speaking the language despite becoming rather good at reading and writing.  If you don't believe me, check out my blog written entirely in Spanish!  My one struggle was still with speaking confidently.  While I do not subscribe to the notion that one must live in a foreign country in order to learn the language, I did feel dropping myself in the middle of Spain would force me to speak the language and therefore increase my proficiency.  That being said, there was a lot more going on in my head besides simply going to Spain.

I'm 33 years old and I have never left the country.  In fact, I have never done much of anything daring.  I allowed myself to become content with a life that was fairly plain and uninteresting.  I made excuses not to do things and found myself often hidden inside a shell, afraid to face the world around me.  Around the same time the idea of travelling to Spain bubbled up inside my thoughts, I had reached a low point in my life.  I was unhappy with who I was and who I had allowed myself to become.  Those around me saw me as a grumpy, rigid, unhappy person.  Instead of countering those notions, I let it define who I was and it brought me into a deep depression.  Thankfully, I saw what was happening and through a series of events, I climbed my way out.  Part of my resurrection came when I decided to make the trip to Spain a reality instead of a fantasy.  Going to Spain became more about challenging who I was and who I wanted to be.  It was about more than taking a vacation.  It was about putting myself in the most uncomfortable position I have ever been in and telling myself that I can do this.  Originally, I planned on making the trip immediately after my 35th birthday in 2016, but thanks to some wonderful inspiration I have decided to go in May of 2015.  I will spend the entire month in Spain, dividing my time between Madrid and Valencia and my goal is not to speak Spanish, rather it is to NOT speak English.  You see, speaking Spanish is easy enough, but I can always fall back on English.  If I make the goal to not use a single word of English, it forces me to find other means of communication.

There are so many other factors that are going to play into this trip.  I used to say I was afraid to fly.  Well, there aren't too many ways to reach Spain from The United States without a plane.  I am quiet in social crowds.  If I am going to improve my speaking skills, I'm going to have to talk, and I imagine it will be uncomfortable for me to start conversations with total strangers, especially those who don't speak English.  Despite living alone, I have never been comfortable going places on my own where I don't know people.  I am fairly certain I do not know a single person in Spain.  This trip is about so much more than seeing a foreign country.  This trip is about challenging myself and every aspect of who I am.

So what I want to know is how those of you out there have used a new language to overcome any fears or reservations about life you may have?  Has speaking a new language offered you the confidence to do things you wouldn't have otherwise done?  I still have months to prepare for my trip and it has given me a new reason to wake up with a smile on my face every morning.  How about you?  Let me know and I'll be sure to add more here soon.